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Hi M, I know this is gonna sound crazy, but it'll make me feel better to put all my thoughts into words. I met you at the coffee shop in February, we talked basically every day and I stayed at the coffee shop upwards of 3AM just so I could talk to you. I was getting a lot of studying done, but mostly I was completely googly-eyed over you. Now let me tell you why this was so weird to me. I was in a six-year relationship. I had never even so much as flirted with a guy besides my boyfriend at the time, we'd been going out since 8th grade and I just really never felt the need to. In a matter of two days of spending late nights chatting and flirting at the coffee shop, I decided I needed to break it off with my ex. My best friends were flabbergasted. It's not like I was breaking up with him FOR you, our relationship had been down the tube for so long. Physical abuse, depression, and fights were an everyday issue for us. But still for all those years I held on for some stupid fucking reason, thinking we were going to make it work and be some love story. You made me realize I didn't have to do that anymore. All of a sudden, I had a handsome stranger flirting me up and I felt like I couldn't just brush it off anymore. I needed to fuck you. I remember before breaking up with my ex, I was on the phone with my best friend. Begging her to come meet you so she could have sex with you and therefor you'd be off limits to me and I could continue on in my fucked up fantasy life with my boyfriend. But then I knew. I broke up with him. I didn't cite you as why, but told him the real reasons, that the pain of the relationship was no longer worth it for me. Then I finally felt it was ok for us to do it. And man did we do it. It was your birthday after all... I mean no joke M, still some of the best sex of my life and I've definitely had my own share of fun since you. Maybe it was because you were the first person I ever had sex with besides my ex? Not really sure, but for some reason that 2 week fling I spent in your bed left me so sexually satisfied I remember telling my best friend, I really don't care what else this is between me and M because it will always be remembered as some of the best sex of my life. I had to cover up hickies all over my neck! I'm sure you remember me bitching at you, because I was still living with my ex at the time. He never even noticed them, it was almost like I was proudly displaying them with my half-assed attempts to put makeup on them. Anyways our fling abruptly ended when one day the day after we had sex you showed up at the coffee shop with another girl. I never said anything about it, you never did either. I guess I just assumed it was over and that was ok with me, although it did burn a little. Deep down I knew we'd never be anything more than sex anyways, but you made it seem so real at times. Summer came and we went our separate ways. And now the awkwardness ensues. Can you please stop using the coffee shop I frequent to pickup women? I remember even thinking about this for a moment during our fling, what will happen when it ends and we see each other at the coffee shop, hmm? Well what happens, is you moseying around trying to pickup women every damn night i'm there. I see the women get all googly eyed, and you sweet talk them into whatever you can I guess. It is so damn distracting when I'm trying to do my homework. It just brings up all the emotions from that time I guess. Oh, and the way you look at me. Like you feel sorry for me or something. You even would come sit with me sometimes and we'd make awkward conversation about nothing. I didn't see the point of it. But now, today you walked in, we barely half waved, and nothing. Not even a hello. Dude. I do not want to fuck you again trust me, your member has too many vaginas around it in a week anyways. Anyways, even though you probably think of me as just one of the many girls you've had sex with from Bennu, you represent a whole new era in my life. I mean shit man, I was basically fucking married. 6 year relationship, living with him for 4 years. that is deep shit doo doo. I have no interest in having sex with you again, but could you at least maybe find a new pickup spot? Or maybe, not give me some pathetic look when you see me like I'm dying to fuck you again. Because I am definitely not, I have my own things going on I just really don't want to watch you put on the same charade every time I go to do my damn homework. I can't just "go somewhere else" this is the only coffee shop open 24 hours and I like to study late night. It's not like I regret anything, in fact sleeping with you was one of the best decisions of my life. It was the ONLY way to really be done with my ex and know that I am ready to meet a bunch of other fish in the sea. Without you, I never would've been able to break up with my ex. I feel like i would've been caught up in the little isolated hell we created for forever.
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